Damn the gods

ODIN THE ALL FATHER HATH DOOMED ME.

As the rest of you bastards surely know, I'm out. My surfing team bit the dust. NO THANKS TO BUDDIES LONG GOLDEN LOCKS OF HAIR. I blame the cab. Useless son of a fisher. SON OF A low born mexican pirate. well hell. i dont even care any more. the rest of you can bugger off.

ok ok.. I"ll still play. So who came in first. Oh yes. F#$#ing big brother. gods are they hopeless. i hope they win, and she has freaking dectoplets. THATS TEN BABIES. i bet she'll name them off the cast of desperate housewives. 

oh ps this may be a negative / rantish email. so again, bugger off

second place..the freaking country singers. OOOOOO TOUGH SPEED BUMP PICK UP A TYPE-WRITER. maybe if they made them write a GOOD SONG then it would have been hard. bahaa. for this challenge you must compose a song, AND IT CAN"T BE ANY OF THAT RUBBISH COUNTRY SHIT.

anyways, in third came the Mormadukes. who only let the girls go ahead of them so that they could satisfy their morman sexual desires ( IF ONLY THEY WERE RELATED THEY COULD GET TOGETHER) just kidding. i dont think mormans are incestual. thats the french. hahahaha. le french. shit im french. F this.

the cowboys came in fourth, im hoping for them because of their accents, maybe if we are lucky, they will court the country singers. WOULDNT THAT MAKE FOR A GOOD TUNE !!!???? no, no it would not.

if fifth came the terrorists. they are hairy. and terrorizing. i mean terrifying. whatever. thanks BIN LADEN

the globes came next. and i dont have anything left to say. 

MY team is out. and i'm mathematically out as well. NO WAY I CAN WIN NOW. well neither can KRYLA. or DAN. so whatever. HEY lets all get together and have a loser beer this week. 

SEE ALL OF YOU FREAKS LATER THIS WEEK. I'm bringing Jen, ( YAAYYYYY ) and cards against humanity. SPOILER ALERT ---

Jen wins.

also, PENIS. i hope you just imagined a PENIS. stupid surfers.

it's 6 am do you know where your children are ?

Because I don't, I don't know where they are. for all i know they could be sneaking around stealing things. or not in existence. you see my body has a rule, once it's been in contact with liquid coffee, it immediately sends me on a running race to the washroom. usually this ends well. unless you meet that awkward person in the hallway who wants to talk, whilst all i can think about is a chocolate explosion that's waiting to happen.

so this week was a great week on the race. i mean just great. people were making paper from elephant dung, and elephants were lifting things up and putting them down.

magical. i know it was a bit disappointing when no one got trampled and or shat on by the elephants BUT HEY THATS PRIMETIME TV FOR YOU HAHAHAH

Team big brother is still my favorite, i really hope they win the race and make BABIES OMFG BABIES EVERYWHERE. and a house he says. but babies first. there should be a law i tell you. a law.

The afghans did an excellent job this leg by terrorising the other teams and somehow ending up in first. you will have noticed them talking with the other Taliban in the taxis orchestrating a coup de taxi and somehow ( probably with poison ) beating the cowboys in a foot race.Yay for Bro-Rob getting his first first first. also he got a point for picking the singers . 2 for ROB YAY. glad you support terrorism.

Willis' cowboys came in second, very close. very close. too bad they DIDN"T have HORSES. not surprising as horses are a prime dish in sri lanka. in fact sri lanka used to have the worlds largest horse population ( some say horses were first found here ) when the locals decided to start eating them because of their obsession with Penelope cruz' nose, they quickly ate away the entire population.

my surfing squad did a lovely job today, and outran Jens teams for a solid turd place.he should cut his hair however, and then punch himself in the face

jens dadson combo came in 4th because they are mormans and slightly dimwitted. just kidding thats rude,they are dimwitted because of the inbreeding in salt lake city.

in 5th was dee's big bro. she didnt cry. in fact she isn crying much and thats bullshit. get off your high horse and start being a whiny bitch again. its no fun .

Don's globetrotters proved once again that they can only play basketball. and MOVE CARS WITH THEIR HANDS SWEET BEHEMOTH.

moms new team the singers wore bras this episode and didnt show cleavage, and hence came in last. in fact they were going to be eliminated until the one secretly offered favours to the host whats his name? paul ? cohegan ? and so yes he didnt eliminate them.

I dont have the updated spreadsheit at work so i cant show you the scores but SIR WILLIS IS IN FIRST WITH 5 points. Mom is in last. but she has a great attitude.

until next time. don't shart in public !!!! or do, and wallow in your filth.